I often think about what kind of relationship I have with my vulva. Ever since starting this blog, I’ve gotten into the habit of randomly taking pictures of my vulva, pretty much whenever I feel like it. I find it really empowering, and it’s quite a lot of fun, too!
The thing is, I used to be really self-conscious about my vulva, so taking pictures of it really wasn’t something that I liked to do before. Of course, after seeing what amazing variation exists out there in nature (thank you Tumblr!), I then realized that my vulva is completely normal and beautiful as well!
I did realize just now, though, that not only did I used to be self-conscious about my vulva, I was also very self-conscious about being self-conscious in the first place! I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because most people simply don’t talk about these sort of things. Or maybe it’s because, by posing the question, “am I really normal down there?” you think you run the risk of getting a reply of, “no, not really normal,” either from yourself or from the surroundings/other people/society/whatever (of course, we are ALL normal, so this is just paranoia and nothing else). Or maybe admitting you’re self-conscious puts you in some perceived vulnerable state, I don’t know.
I guess that, mainly, I didn’t know whether being self-conscious about that part of yourself was normal or not, so I suppose I had a double concern there — is it normal to wonder if your vulva is normal? Is it normal to feel self-conscious?
After discovering the body positivity movement, I then realized that YES, lots of women feel self-conscious about their vulvas. Lots and lots and lots. I found this fantastic post that I reblogged, exploring the topic… And the numbers are baffling to me. Really baffling.
Of course, if you’re not self-conscious and never have been, that’s totally normal as well. And that’s great! But if you have been, or if you still are, just know that you’re really not alone. Not by a long shot. And it’s totally okay to explore those thoughts, and totally okay to explore that whole world of vulvas, too. But it seems to me that plenty of women are, or were, self-conscious about their vulvas, and I just wanted to point out that it happens to the best of us. Considering how common those feelings are, there’s no need to feel self-conscious about feeling self-conscious.
I will also say that all vulvas are beautiful. Yours is too, whether you’re self-conscious or not. Sometimes we need a bit of help to see it, but it’s really not impossible to learn to love yourself, no matter how self-conscious you were to begin with. It’s just matter of realizing your vulva is perfectly normal and beautiful, just like everyone else’s.